bethysmalls

1. I am getting the minimum amount of sleep required for basic human function.

2. My roommate will wake me in the middle of the night sometimes just to talk (or, you know, cry)

3. I can’t stop playing bejeweled.

In other news, the plan seems to be working, for the most part. It also seems that the 4th time we put him down every day is a struggle. If he takes 3 naps and can make it to bed time he will cry for at least 40 minutes at bed time. If he takes 3 short naps and needs a 4th, he’ll cry for at least 40 minutes but go down like a little angel for bed.

As for the formula. I went to my doctor the same day I wrote my plea for advice and I was fully prepared to start supplementing at night. One of the main reasons I was so hesitant to start down Formula Road was the cost. My breast milk is free, ya know, and it’s been working well thus far (have I mentioned he’s in the 75th percentile for weight?). So we just had to suck it up and let him cry it out.

I didn’t really know what I thought about the Cry It Out method before actually trying it. I’m sure I thought, in the back of my mind at least, that it was unnecessarily harsh and that there must be a better way. That is obviously the opinion of a person without a child who won’t. go. to sleeeeeeeepfortheloveofGOD! I mean, it has been difficult at times, no doubt about it. But the benefits are like unbelievable. He can now put him self to sleep within minutes, sometimes moments 3/4 times a day. He has the ability to sleep through the night and his parents can sleep, too which is very very nice.

However. Last night Bruno realized he could roll over in bed and when he did that he freaked the eff out. We each went into the room and re-swaddled him 2 or 3 times, I’m not sure, it was late. After every re-swaddle and sooth he would wriggle free, flip over and then freak. We finally got him back to sleep and then he actually slept a little later, 6:45, but was on his belly, mock swimming in his crib.

Here are my tweets from last night.

http://twitter.com/bethysmalls/status/1910626715

http://twitter.com/bethysmalls/status/1910635647

http://twitter.com/bethysmalls/status/1910662657

http://twitter.com/bethysmalls/status/1910671545

What else are you going to do at 4am?

After I fed Bruno this morning, his Daddy whisked him away for a walk and I got to sleep until 8:30!!!!!!!!! He’s the most wonderful man in the world, am I right?

Yesterday after I wrote a message in a blog post to all of you*, I took Bruno to the doctor for his 4 month well baby visit**. I told my doctor about how it was very difficult to get little B to sleep and so big B was super stressed and exhausted. I told her my thoughts and she kind of shot them down. She told me a few things to keep in mind, all of which I’d read or heard or tried to implement into my current routine. I felt kind of disappointed. I asked about sleep training and she said that that was okay to try which I was surprised/relieved about since I wasn’t sure what age was OK to start.

She gave us a handout on sleep tips for different aged babies. I wasn’t all together happy about the appointment, expecting some sort of miracle solution, I guess. And then she said, “Have you tried letting him cry for a few minutes?” I told her I had in a way. During naps if he is whining I would let him go for a few minutes but if he started to really cry I’d go in and try to soothe him. She told me to give it a try and sometimes that’s all they need. Yadda yadda it’s okay to pick up newborns, yadda yadda they can figure it out at this age, yadda yadda so you can let him go for 20 or 30 minutes and see if that does the trick. . .

I repeated this back to her 2 times over the next 2 minutes, like, “you’re sure? 20 or 30 minutes? It won’t make me a horrible person?” Truth is, it’s what my heart and mind had been telling me to do for the last couple of weeks but I kept thinking it was just my incredibly tired and worn out devil on my shoulder being a biotch. And then I asked, “For naps, too?” Cause I figure, if I let him go for bed time but still hang around for naps, it might not do much for the net benefit, ya know? “For naps, too. It might be all he needs.”

So we headed out, after the Dr. to our softball game. On the way we talked about what a reasonable bed time would be for all of us and we talked about our strategy. “I think you should go for a walk,” my very smart husband said. “Yeah, I know.” I replied. His resolve is much better than mine and I knew that even if I was home with my headphones on, I’d be stressy and clenchy and pace-y.

We got to softball and we had told our manager that only one of us would be able to play at a time and that was our terms. It’s not very competitive, our league, and my husband is the Ringer and they need me ’cause I help fill the girl quota so I knew our demands would be met. During one inning where I was on the field, Hoagey was holding Bruno who was starting to get a little fussy so he was rocking him and soothing him. As I came off the field he was chuckling a bit. “If we were in his room right now, he’d be screaming.” I looked down at our baby who was nearly asleep and calm as could be. He was right of course. Bruno has been a BEAR to put down for a while now and it was not because he hasn’t been tired. He just wanted to hang out. His room was, like, the last place he wanted to be.

I knew that this baby needed to be sleeping and I knew that he wasn’t hurting or scared. He just wanted to stay up late. I remember feeling like that when I was a little kid, I just didn’t realize it happened so early on.

When we got home from our game I fed Bruno, I took him upstairs and created a bedtime routine. After it was all done, I came downstairs, put my shoes on and went to Starbucks and told Hoagey to text me when it was safe to come back. “So just check on him in 20 minutes?” “Yup. I’ll get you something from Rita’s if it’s still open.” (It wasn’t. Boo.)

At 2am Bruno woke up, Hoagey checked on him and came back to bed. 3 minutes later we were all asleep again. No feeding required. This morning at 6:55 when Bruno woke up again, he actually smiled at us. He cried immediately after because he was hungry, but still, it was nice.

*not from this morning, but you get the idea*

*Thanks, by the way, to all of you who answered my call. I received lots of heart felt, thoughtful advice and it helped me to see that there are lots of ways to do things. I’m still breast feeding but I think with this new approach, I’m going to be a lot more rested and we’ll all be a lot happier.

**Bruno, by the way, is in the 90th percentile of height and 75th for weight and head circumference. The doctor assumed we had some tall genes in the family. I told her, um, not really. The tallest of our parents is my dad at 6’1″ maybe and I’m pretty sure that’s on par for dudes. I was tall growing up but I was just faster than everyone else and then they caught up. I think that’s where we’re headed with the Brown Bear. No easy dunks for you, my son. Go work on your change up.

So. I have been, up to this point, resistant to supplementing. I don’t know why. It’s probably because I’m a little OCD but the fact of the matter is that I’m exhausted. I’m sure Ryan is, too. This morning in the shower I started thinking that maybe I should just get over whatever it is that I’m worried about and start giving him some formula. I seriously sat there for 5 seconds before I could even type the word, what is my deal?! Part of it, I’m sure is that I like knowing what he’s getting is all natural but I’m. So. Tired.

Bruno used to occasionally sleep 7+ hours straight at night but now it’s more like 4.5-6 and it’s shading more towards the 4.5… But will supplementing actually help my quality of life? I wake up whenever he peeps. I’ve even tried napping with earplugs (while daddy is home, of course) and his frequencies can penetrate them. I blame my highly honed maternal instincts. And the fact that our house is small and noises bounce around in there and amplify and you can hear everything from everywhere all the time.

So do I break the seal and give him some formula to see if it helps him sleep? To see if his dad can take care of him some nights and I can do it other nights? What if it doesn’t work? I’ll have ruined my no formula record and my OCD will never forgive me!!!

Keep in mind, before you respond (and please respond!), that I have a bit of an overachiever complex: use cloth diapers and wipes, have been making my own baby food, work at a job outside my home and feel guilty when I don’t make dinner, sweep the floors, and also when Bruno cries.

(This started as a message to a friend and as I was reading it I realized it was really a blog post. And also, I could probably use that title for every single thing I put up here.)

Holy crap, guys. Did you see House, MD last night?!?

When I got up at 4am to feed Bruno, I was too freaked to go back to sleep cause I kept seeing Amber whispering into House’s ear and so while my baby ate, I checked my email on my phone to take my mind off of it.

Seriously, that was cray-zeee.

I didn’t get to see the whole episode because a certain member of our family has become resistant to going to sleep at twilight (I’m looking at you, Uncle Skippy). But it didn’t matter cause the shocking part came right at the end and all you had to see up to that point to be SHOCKED was the previous episode, which, thanks to the Internet, I had.

(I’d like to let you all know, since we’re talking about TV, that for our Cheese Steak -iversary, and to make up for all the gifts I’d given in the past few years, I bought my husband an LCD HDTV! Woo! Only, our cable was not up to bringing us HDTV and in the end, we had to upgrade our service and pay more money. So once again, gift giving FAIL. But the TV is pretty sweet and now we can watch Jeopardy! in HD! Oh and sports. woo.)

So anyway, if you’re not watching House, get on that. You’ve got all summer. Catch up. What else do you have to do? Be outside? Nonsense! Stay inside where it’s cool and watch House. Best show on TV. Also Lie to Me. Watch that too. Ok, I’m done now.

Ok, here’s a picture of my adorable baby.

how can you stand how cute i am? seriously!

Last weekend, Bruno ate food that was only semi-liquid which means it was also semi-solid. Bruno had some rice cereal!!! It went pretty well and the first problem we encountered was our(hoagey’s and my) own forgetfulness.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ripWzGOMa4Q]

So we tried again.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVNSLhbqU5k]
(music credit: Eyeball Skeleton)

(that was our 3rd try as the title implies but take two featured a ridiculously witch-like cackle from yours truly. If you really want to see/hear it, you can find it on youtube.com)

Day two went well, too. I mean we remembered the bib, for one thing.
Although I totally said “shit” while feeding him and it was all caught on video! So of course I’ll share it with you! Fun!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31OxMrosIyw]
I am clearly an awesome mom.

He seems to have no opinion on eating off a spoon one way or another. Which is fine. Once he starts getting the hang of it though, I’ve got an ice cube tray full of frozen sweet potato puree waiting for him. YAMS!

And as a bonus for all my dozens of readers (love you guys!) here’s a picture of Bruno in SHOES! yay!

This was too long to tweet but I wanted to share it anyway.

Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately. – Scott Adams